Partly Facetious: poll-violence: everyone said his part as expected

"So how many people died during the polls?"
"None were poll related."
"What? Are you insane?"
"Nope, just repeating what our esteemed election commissioner said."
"And what logic did the guy use?"
"Since none of the victims died in a polling station..."
"Give me a break!"
"I am just repeating what he said."
"What did the Chosen One say?"
"He said polls were held in a peaceful manner and democracy a la Musharraf is successful and..."
"He didn't say that!"
"No, you are right. I am being facetious. He didn't say that. But he did say that polls were held in a peaceful atmosphere and..."
"And what did the Big Man say?"
"You know India has the Big B and we have the Big M."
"Indeed we do."
"Anyway, what did our Big M say?"
"He said that the extremists have been defeated."
"And by that he meant?"
"That only the Lotas have succeeded."
"Ah yes, I see where this is going."
"And what did the opposition say?"
"Cheating and rigging."
"What did the independent press say?"
"Pre-poll and during poll rigging."
"Ah yes. So I am happy to say that everyone said precisely what I would have predicted they would say."
"And the majority won who you thought would have won?"
"Well yes."
"Then why did we spend so much money for the exercise?"
"Makes Big M happy. That's important no!"